Falls and injuries from falls can be a significant concern for older adults, but there are many steps we can take to reduce the risk of falls and stay safe. A challenging dynamic relating to dealing with the vulnerability of falls is helping aging adults address the issue. Many are ten years removed from the peak of their lives - having run companies, built families, and helped grandchildren. Now, as they age, they become vulnerable and may view themselves as a burden to others around them.
Very normal issues like pride, acceptance of aging and independence come into play. As a result, aging adults need to talk with others about their anxieties and experiences around falls. Unfortunately, the same relationships that they have with children and loved ones may not be the best relationships to open up about the issues.
Why not talk to adult children?
The complex range of issues is not one easily understood by their children (often adults in their 30s through 50s) unless they are professionals in the field. For beginners, the sandwich generation (see sandwich blog post link) seldom has time to pause and spend quality time understanding and helping process emotions for anyone (often including themselves!)
Very often aging parents do not want to open up with their children for fear of adding a burden. Sometimes, they have many complaints, and fear of falling is just not high enough to register, or blends in with other more pressing concerns (medicines, appointments, typical aging aches and pains).
Speaking personally about things - I have seen adults confide about their concerns when with their physical/occupational therapist, that is ‘no problem’ when their children are present for the appointment. For example , I have seen a mother tell me that everything is fine with her health as I don’t see her daily. Then when we do meet she has an awful cough with a sore throat that she has not addressed.
A Better Way
Finding a group of friends or network to share these concerns and feelings will help accept the steps they need to take to help.
Personal stories and concerns will develop trust among a group of friends, while fostering each person to reflect on their journey and learn that everyone falls. Hearing peers explain their own mistakes that led to a fall is a chance for an older adult to self-reflect on the life changes that need to happen to avoid a fall. It will be easier to relate to others and learn from them. The emotional and social support gained have unique advantages as well. Consider the Blue Zones study. Supporting groups of friends is a key to a longer and happier life. See the
research article summary here.
Recommended Books by Dan Buettner, a National Geographic Fellow and journalist that discovered and researched the five places – dubbed blue zones hotspots – where people live the longest, healthiest lives. The books he published make a case for how the rest of us (in other areas) can use these principles to enjoy a happier and healthier life.
Helping aging adults talk through their concerns and learn from other peers is critical to successfully making a plan to prevent and recover from falls.
